Details?

You people really want details? Well, it all started one afternoon... JUST KIDDING.

The long version, Brent and I thought we would adopt again. We have been researching, asking questions, talking to people and all we found out was that Guatemala is closed and IF it opens back up the process may be very disheartening. We also contacted 4 domestic agencies. 2 of them told us we were not candidates for their programs because "we could have our own children" and 2 told us that they "would take our money" but did not feel like we were likely candidates because most birth moms were looking for smaller families, and that it could take a lot of time. We looked into other countries, and even though our hearts cry out for the orphans... we could not find a program that would work for our family (based on our family size, travel times, time lines, etc). That may sound like we were giving up on adoption to some, but we feel like we listened and were not given confirmation. I talked to Brent a lot about "just seeing what would happen", for a long time he did not agree. One day he either had a weak moment, or he just got tired... and agreed to "see what would happen". And that folks is the rest of the story. And I am serious... ONE TIME. I know that that fact probably hurts some of your hearts, because as I type this I think about how upsetting it is for so many of you who have tried for so long. But truth be known, that is why I am in such shock. I do know how it happens, but just one time???

And then there is the other side. I AM SICK! I have never been sick in pregnancy before. And when I say sick, I mean the doctor put me on Zo*fran. The medicine they give chemo patients for nausea. I had spent 3 days curled up in the fetal position in the bathroom floor when Brent said I had to do something, so I called thinking she would tell me some magic trick to avoid nausea... and she called me in a prescription. I cried! Because my friend, Nicole had to be put on the same meds... and SHE WAS SICK. Surely I was not in the same boat. That med was for people who really got sick, not me. But, I got it so I could be functional for the rest of my family... some days I am functional. Some days not so much. I hope the side effects include the ability to fall asleep in the middle of the WWF wrestling simulation by my boys, because I sure can accomplish that. The meds also have the ability to COMPLETELY stop all function in your colon and intestines (if you know what I mean), but "that's all I've got to say about that".

So, today I am officially 8 weeks and 2 days into my God given blessing (due on Brent's Birthday... July 7th) . I know many of you think 5 kids is crazy, it has crossed my mind a time or two as well. But, if there is one thing that God made me to be it is a MOMMY. I am not saying that I am the best one out there, or that I am even all that good at it, but it is who I am and what I love. I am thankful that God thinks enough of me to think that I can handle it, and that He has blessed me "exceedingly abundantly", because I KNOW I don't deserve it.